Worthless

When I left my job, one aspect of my last 10 years of software tools was conservatively valued as an asset on the corporation’s books. You do not know how rare that is for a programmer’s work, especially in the modern world where companies buy their main software. They then consider said software, and any additional programming associated to using that software as overhead.

So it messaged my ego when I found out that it was valued at $2,000,000; far above what they had paid me, including all benefits.

Since that time, the parent corporation 1) milked the company dry, pulling every stray dollar they could out of it and the Hell with any future, and then 2) piecemeal selling it off to make what they could from the remnants.

My tools were to help both in the present and the long term. I have learned that they were somewhat working the last time I checked in, but no one was keeping them upgraded, no one was trying to improve them, and certainly no one was trying to build on them.

My career that I sacrificed my health for, sacrificed time with my family for, sacrificed my sanity at times for: worthless.

Sandy, dear Sandy. Once again I apologize for making you wait while I finished up a project before picking you up. Once again I apologize that we did not spend more time together when we were both healthier seeing and doing the things we wanted to do and see: all those things we missed because we couldn’t do at the end. I am sorry.

I guess my ego needed to be deflated. I needed to be shown just how worthless this crap was in comparison to my time with Sandy and my family.