Have you heard of a Death watch? That is where loved ones sit around the bed of a dying person during their last moments, essentially waiting for them to die.
Well, let me tell you about a Life Watch. I happened to me and my late wife, Sandy.
Two years ago, the 29th and 30th of September, 2021 we had a Life Watch.
By the 29th Sandy had been in the CICU for 7 days and, with lots of drugs, was relatively stable and awake; although on machines. That morning the Cardiovascular Doctors called me at home, suggesting a last ditch plan to try to fix her heart. They wished to discuss it with me so despite Covid-19 restrictions, I was allowed to go to the CICU (seeing Sandy for the first time in 7 days – the longest we had ever been apart). Sandy was cognizant so both of us heard out the doctors and approved their plan. However, just a couple of hours later, they came back and told us that because of her dependence on medication to raise her BP, she could not survive a stay on the operating table.
The only solution was to withdraw the BP medication and for her to slip away. Not a fun time. But after discussing it, she decided that they would not increase her levels of medication and when she dropped into a coma because of her dropping BP, they would just turn off the medication and she would just pass away. And that is what happened.
That scenario was what we both went through for about 24 hours, with me only going home a couple of times to take care of our animals; returning as quickly as possible.
She slept most of time. Even when she was awake we spoke little. I held her hand but for some reason it sometimes hurt. But we didn’t need to talk much. We had said all we needed to say every day for the 30+ years together. If we had left anything unsaid, now was not the time.
But most of all, even when I was sitting in the chair, half asleep and listening to her breathing, it never ever was a Death Watch. Every single moment I spent thanking God for our Life together, and selfishly hoping for just a little more time.
